Our time is so precious. So easily wasted.

Isn't it strange how we always feel like we have so much time...so much time to "get back around" to things...keeping in touch with our loved ones, making connections, witnessing to those in need...time to come back to God when we're finished learning the "hard way" (which is a cop out a lot of the time).
It is always when someone you've known...someone young dies too early that it shocks us back into reality.  It's almost as if you say- oh yea- we are merely mortal.  ANYTHING can happen.  Not that we are to live in a state of fear and paranoia- but that we live wisely.

Its time to stop being too proud to make amends.  Its time to stop blaming life for the reason you are not fully living for God.  When you feel the urge in your soul to say something to someone- something you feel is from God...say it.  We are all simply human...we all need love...ALL of us have issues.

Today I have been feeling sad and somber.  A young woman, who I knew from my year at Elim Bible Institute died this week...a freak situation really...so unexpected.  Not only did she pass away- but so did her two month old daughter.  The circumstances are so sad...one in a million really.  It made me realize...why do I waste time...WHY.  Why do I not confront issues I know are there...with myself and loved ones.  Afraid of making an uncomfortable situation...when I know this person could be gone tomorrow?

Satan wants us all to be islands...alone...feeling as though we are so shameful, that our good Christian friends would not look at us the same if they really knew our "stuff"...but where else can we go with our issues...  This challenges me to be more open...but also to be a better friends as well.  We are all riddled with so many issues and complexities.  I always find that when I am truly open with my family in Christ...its when I feel relieved, truly able to get out of my funk.

There is a song by Tenth Avenue North called "Healing Begins"...its how I feel about certain people in my life, and can really be applied to us all.

So you thought you had to keep this up
All the work that you do
So we think that you're good
And you can't believe it's not enough
All the walls you built up
Are just glass on the outside

So let 'em fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now

This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark

Afraid to let your secrets out
Everything that you hide
Can come crashing through the door now
But too scared to face all your fear
So you hide but you find
That the shame won't disappear

So let it fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
We're here now, oh

This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark

Sparks will fly as grace collides
With the dark inside of us
So please don't fight
This coming light
Let this blood come cover us
His blood can cover us

This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark 


So stop living on your island...stop being silly about something someone said that made you mad...you be the bigger person...really LIVE your life in a way you would be proud of if today was your last day.  Easier said than done, but that is when we really put our cares on Jesus and allow Him to do His amazing work.  Something I need to try a little (ok..a lot) more often.

Stop Obsessively Looking Inward and Look Outward

"The postmodern infatuation with journey feeds on and into a preoccupation with our own stories.  If my grandparents' generation could be a little stoic and not terribly reflective, my generation is introspective at a level somewhere between self-absorption and narcissism.  We are so in-tuned with our dysfunctions, hurts, and idiosyncrasies that it often prevents us from growing up, because maturity is tantamount to hypocrisy in a world that prizes brokenness more than health"
-Why We're Not Emergent, Kevin DeYound & Ted Kluck-

This might seem like a strange start to a blog, considering the point is to really talk about your life...but the difference between simply talking about life, and obsessing about our own problems to the point of stalling our Christian life is the difference.
I read this portion of the very good book  "Why We're Not Emergent" on Saturday.  I was really convicted because I have a tendency to be overly introspective.  This can be good and bad.  We can either look inside of ourselves and do something about the problems we see, or we can become so fixed on those problems that we are too busy to notice the world around us.  We can act like we are being amazingly deep, while we are simply being self consumed.
This concept was brought up again on Sunday at church.  This past week was testimony Sunday and a few different people got up and said the same thing...it seemed like a theme really.  That we are too focused on just us...our problems...our bills that aren't getting paid. 
Relying on our own thoughts and feelings is not a sure way of becoming "Christ-like", and while we all struggle...we must avoid wearing our problems as badges of honor in a way.

"Sincerity is a Christian virtue, as is honest about our struggles.  But my generation needs to realize that Christianity is more than chic fragility, endless self revelation, and the coolness that comes with authenticity"
-Why We're Not Emergent, pg 34-